It's just one thing that's got me trippin'... Today, my day has been immersed in babies. This morning early, I had to go to Nicole's barn with her where she keeps her horse to doctor his legs and of course, who came with us? Aadon, the cutie. I chased him and held his hand and walked with him while he swung our hands between us and we went to dinner and we shared french fries and fought over which song to play on the Jukebox. It was glorious. After that, I went onto a forum that I frequent and to help a friend with her psych paper, filled out a survey and one of the questions was: "Do you feel pressure from friends and family to settle down and start a family?" And my response was: I don't think they purposely pressure me, but my mother has baby syndrome. She LOVES babies, and has talked repeatedly about how much she would love to have a baby now. She is young enough to have another but unable to concieve so it's just not possible. I have a lot of friends from high school that have also settled down into "adult relationships", and some that are even married (and/or pregnant). I don't feel like they're pressuring me, but sometimes I look at them and think "What? Am I not normal? Why isn't this happening to me?" even though I am fully concious that getting married/starting a family would be completely out of the question for me for years and years to come as I am not fully prepared to enter into a co-dependant relationship. After that, I got myself off work a bit early and went to the mall in town with Nicole and my mom. Nicole was picking up some Christmas presents for Aadon and Alex, and we went into The Children's Place, this trendy store for children's clothing. This is the kinda store that sells little workboots for boys and little sparkly hipster jeans for girls. I went into the newborn section and was fawning over some clothes, and then it hit me -- if I didn't get out of there IMMEDIATELY, I was going to spontaneously concieve! Narrowly avoiding spontaneous conception, I raced out of the store and home. I don't want a baby, but I love them so darn much, it's just not even funny. Rar. I don't know why I have baby fever right now, it's totally unrealistic, but it's interesting to imagine..
Disclaimer: These are my personal thoughts, emotions and opinions -- they are not intended to offend or aggress upon anyone. Likewise, though I do appreciate a constructively critical comment on occasion, I prefer non-hateful and thoughtful comments with respect to myself. I shouldn't have any problems with that though, we're all grown ups here, right? Please note that any offensive, aggressive and anonymous comments will be deleted from my comments, notes and guestbook, as I like knowing that the rest of my readership doesn't have to read that trash. Also, the HTML on this design has been designed solely by myself, Amanda Neal, and song lyrics are from the song "Wild Horses" by Natasha Bedingfield.
Monday, Oct. 17, 2005 ~ 10:44 p.m.
